In the Mooood? SMS Me.

When the New York Times uses an acronym like SMS without bothering to explain what the letters stand for (even parenthetically), I am sure that I’ve been put out to pasture.

The story, today, was titled “Swiss Cows Send Texts to Announce They’re in Heat.” Brigitte was amused and read me the story, but wondered what SMS stood for. “Occasionally he gets an SMS from one of his cows.” The poor cows have a device inserted into their privates, and the widget can generate a message in one of several languages. Baffled—and humbled. Here I am, the man who can answer any question, trying to link sado-masochism to the barnyard—but the context doesn’t seem right.

Well, I’m still smart enough to use Google. Here’s the explanation for all the rest of you left-behinds. SMS stands for Short Message Service. It’s something that iPhones do.